08 November 2008

Rhys Needs Your Vote. I guess.



I've been informed by the rest of the household that we're having an election for Pack Leader. I'm running against Rhys, the Cardigan Corgi. (Shown here in a photo from his youth.)





I'm not sure what Rhys's platform is (mine is that I pay the mortgage, buy the dog food, and have opposable thumbs), but he's got a lot of campaign strategy together already.



One front involves accusing me of giving in to the child and buying him a used PlayStation II for his birthday last August. "Do you want an enabler as pack leader?" Rhys's ad will say. Then it will show Rhys running away with one of his toys in his mouth, with the voice-over saying, "Vote for Rhys. He's no enabler. He'll never give up his toys."

I did buy the child a used PlayStation II for his birthday. I admit that. But it was made after careful consideration of time constraints and budget constraints, and I stand by that decision.

Rhys can run against me all he wants. I'm taking him to Bad Dog Class today, and we'll see where that gets him.

Also. If he doesn't stop jumping off the bed, and start remembering to use those pricey foam stairs I got him, he's going to do severe damage to himself. Do you want a pack leader who's got permanent joint damage at the age of one and a half? I think not, and I'd like to point out that at 54, I'm in excellent health (well, except for that allergy and not breathing stuff), and do not have to use the foam stairs to get in and out of the bed.

I'm just saying. If you want a bossy, adorable, bossy, barking, bossy, loving, bossy damn Cardigan Corgi to run the house, you go ahead and vote for Rhys as Pack Leader. But remember. A vote for Rhys is a vote for Mayhem.

5 comments:

RhysnBanon said...

Two votes for Rhys... Mayhem is our platform too:0)

Marjie said...

I shall have to vote for Rhys. After all, he's special needs (he has no opposable thumbs) and if he does himself an injury just think FDR with fur.

Reya Mellicker said...

I'm voting for you, Pandora. As I recall, you can be just as bossy as anyone else when you need to be.

I'm pro-opposable thumbs, and I vote!

Anonymous said...

As the owner of 2 dastardly Cairn Terriers, I believe it would be most prudent to vote for you, my darling Pandora. I have great faith in your ability to be bossy.

Stella and Violet vote for Rhys...but add that their vote of support is only a ruse as they would really just like to boss him around...

love,
Jezebel

Elan said...

no offense, but my heart has been stolen. who can resist those ears? those eyes? and Rhys' aren't bad either.
j.k.
i vote for Rhys.
-ej